2010

wow...half an hour more..
everyone is outing.
count down..
how lame am i sitting at home?
but this time..
i am willing to sit at home..
i prefer alone ...
to clear my mind..
and i don't know why..
sometimes...
i just let myself be the one to be left out..
and it's worst that this is what i want..
i love to be alone sometimes..
because..
this is the time i can be myself..
lazy..
dirty...
XD

2010

new lessons....in year 2010.....4 myself^
when you said you couldn't mix around with that group of friends..
you slowly realize that the reason is that..
you don't even like to be in their group..
and you will realize that..
you just need a little effort to mix around..
and the reason you are not
is that you don't think you will happy with them..
friends..
are important..
but when you want more and more...
feeling greedy..
you will lose all..
appreciate the friends around is much more important..~
love what you already had...
when your friends call you out...
make sure you reject it if you don't have the mood to mix around..
or you will become what they said as a wet blanket...
when your friends are engaging with their couples..
make sure you are not alone and have few friends..
or people keep saying you are a light bulb..
and no matter how much you try to convince yourself that you don't even care about what they said...
you care about it..
you are hurt..
i am hurt...though..
when you are in the negative moody moody..
don't try hard to mix around..
or you will end up crying alone in the toilet..
although that's nobody fault..
calm down yourself in whatever situation..
if you want a better solution..
don't be a dramatic queen...~

2010

start from this year,2010..
school...tuition...
that's the main life..right?as a student..
before entering this year..
i kept hearing from others that form 4 is a really tough year..
life will get busy..
stress will multiplied...
but after i myself gone through this year..
i got a different opinion from others..
because 4 me..
this is a honeymoon year..
less project..
less exam..
and now..
i am SCARED!really really scared..
because i know i take this year so careful..
too happy..
and next year...
i have to pay much more effort than this year.
i am sick of thinking about it..
anyway..
it's okay..
i will try my best..
maybe even overpush myself..
this year...
i kept hearing comments from friends..
saying i have little girl friends and always mix around with boys more..
and i am hurt..
really hurt..
but..
i think..
happy is enough for the reason..
so why should i care?
it's impossible to make the whole world same..
and next year...
i think no more VILLAGE MALL.....
no more!!!!!!
maybe just once or twice,XD...~
i really need to change myself to be a more discipline person next year..
to be more concentrate on studies..
at least this year i didn't on9 like before..
i learn to control myself..
and now
guess what..
i can survive without computer for 15days...
and i don't think computer is imporatant to me anymore..
live in the world of internet..
is far more from reality..
although it brings fun..
still...
we need to learn to survive in the real-life situation..

2010

wow...2010 is gonna end..
and 2011 is coming..~
what word is suitable to describe 2010..
i am not sure...
because fast is not enough...
it is extremely fast....
the day i came into this new class...
and think that this is so unfair since not everyone get change...
and then felt happy in this class...
and then think that i miss my previous class...
wao..
i don't know..
what a teenage girl is thinking,huh?
kinda weird...
and i admit it..
emotion is killing me sometimes...
but anyway...
at least now i know it's extremely normal ..
i am just being a teenager.....XD...
time is fast...
especially when we are busy coping with our lives..
we can't expect the world to revolve around us...
and i know...
that i don't like it when i felt left out..
when people don't think so and i am the one that think like this..
people think this as sensitive or whatever...
negative..
i am sensitive..
i sure couldn't deny it..
still..
this is me..
we are who we are,right..
and i have no right to change..
because
last time i try so hard to change myself
and i am lost..
i am not myself anymore..
god make me who i am,,
and i know that i should feel grateful..
to accept myself..
sensitive is not wrong..
we are who we are...
when i feel left out..
i was sad..
i even cried..
and although i knew how stupid am i,i just couldn't stop my tears from flowing out..
anyway..i know that i learn a lot of new lessons in this year...^~
friends....
i knew a lot of friends this year..
sure...
the new class...
from penang..
from kelantan,terengganu,johor..
some from camp..
and i am glad..
because there's so many people in this world..
and everyday in school life..
i realize how small is my world...
and that's important to me..
because...
everyone is different..
and no one can judge them by saying how wrong or right they are..
still
we are who we are...
love yourself..
that 's important

...

我只是想让你知道...
我不是每次都愿意主动的...
可是...
你却当成理所当然..
因为在你的世界里...
就是挤满了那么多人...
而我...
也早就懂了...
可是...
我还是做了原本就知道是错的选择~

原谅我

我不懂是巧合..
为什么要那么巧....
在我的脑海...
你的影子已渐渐后退..
你却选择在这时候上前来了...
为什么是现在....
我不懂如何回应...
请原谅我的冷漠....

camp dec2010

just back from alor setar camp yesterday....
feel tired because of 3 sleepless nite..
before going is because too excited...
at there i can't sleep as i miss my own bed..
i don't know whether i am happy ..
but i am very sure i am really happy on the second day..
when everyone so busy preparing for the performance...
i am a really shy girl...so..
it's not easy for me to be proactive to greet people..
depends..
on who are the person..
some person seem easy to interact with..
but some not very...
讲座会的确很沉闷啦...
我不懂内容是什么....
和组员也很少讲话..
也许是睡不够的关系吧...
提不起劲....
可是这些的组员是我在参加过的升华营里最满意的了....
因为大家都很好笑吧....
可是不知道为什么那些男生看起来好成熟...
事实上却都不大...
想提醒自己
要勇敢的表达自己....
不要每次都因为害羞而不敢表达自己....
因为..
到后来才发现..
只要主动多一些...
勇敢地开口说话..
其实大家都能沟通的....
让回忆成为回忆吧....
因为...
明天醒来....太阳还是新的...^^~