don't let me down

wah...
what a mix-bla-bla-bla mood!!!!!!!!!!!
whats!
i am happy~
but i am going to cry!!!!!!!!!!
what's this mood!
huh?!!!!!!!!!!
happy>?sad>?
i don't even know..~i hope i know better..
in this situation..
i don't make me hope much..
because i am scared of losing the kind of waiting mood!!!!!!!
please..
don't let me down..
or..
i won't ever ever forgive you!!!!!!!!!!!!!
one day
i want to be your friends..
i want our time to be back..
back to a better future..
better friendship...
i want it..
can you understand ??~
huh?~
but one day
i saw you
and you are the one like i had never know before..
who are you???~
are we still FRIENDS?

shut up!

i am so .!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
the words...told her her...!
wat the!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i am just so angry about it..!!!!!!!!!!
that's what you like?
comparing around?
comparing about this and that?
i don't like about it okay>?
just shut up before..
i said 'shut up' in front of you
!
okay!
just shut up!just shut up shut up shut up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i am not a good-tempered person okay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
shut up..
don't make me rude!

THE FIRST SCHOOLDAY

wow..
the first day of school in 2011...
my first day in form 5 life...
and my last chance of tasting the first day of high school's life..
i don't know what word is suitable to describe my first day..
i just know that sometimes..
we need to be proactive to get what we really want..
and not just sitting there...
and waiting for the chance to come knocking the door...
because this is ridiculous..
i am always the one waiting..
waiting for people to help me..
waiting for people to give me opportunity..
i know i am being ridiculous too..
because just now i feel sad for a little moment..
because from assistant monitor..
i get nothing in class this year..
and a little bit of frustration maybe..
anyway..
i don't even know the reason i am thinking like this..
since i reject myself what comes to me..
bm pj..
whatever..
i should know that when we want something,
we should always get it ourselves..
and not dreaming and hoping people to fulfill your wish..
just like the lessons go,
they are never real Santa Claus during Christmas time...
they are just your parents,
or someone that cares about you..
someone that love you..
but..
as life goes..
the one that loved and protect you can't always be beside you..
being your angel
isn't means all the time..
sometimes
we just need to be more independent..
and work hard for what we really want..
not wasting time waiting for the opportunity..or wasting time being down about the way yourself lose the chance..
chance comes and go..
and always..
i am the one that let it go..
but this only teach me to grab the opportunity more tightly next time...
so that i won't lose it
again and again....
i know i shouldn't feel negative in the first day..
but still
i lighten up myself..
by trying to talk...
sometimes..
i just can't find the right words..
anyway..
i enjoy the time to laugh loudly and uncontrollably...